#Equal Food Rights for Dogs or #Double Noms

Sunday, September 26, 2010

Da Trial Run.....

Today be da day dat we find out just how practical my plan for the bomb really is, we did sleep in cause of daylight saving time changing, whatever dat is. This be da first ting dat I hadn't tought of, I should have known by dis it wasn't gunna be a great day.
We got up and had morning nom nom's, I cant go anywhere wifout my breakfast and then Jess and I did sneek out da back door when da hoomins wernt watching. We had da BOMB wif us.
We snuck through the back fence in our special sneeky out spot, over da carpark and into da neighbours place through there fence in a spot we had previously taken a few bricks from.
Da neighbours do have a real nice house so I wanna be careful so me and Jess redo da calculations to make sure we got dem spot on right, each time we does work it out we fink, no we sure we got it all measured right. Jess does check dat day still on holiday and dat no one home in da house den we hide behind da brick wall in a safe place so we tinking Health and Safety all the time ok.
Jess den says to me 'You sure about this Baxter' and I don't fink, my tummy takes over and I say 'Lets do it Jess'. My big mistake.
I jump on da exploder ting and BANG, da bomb goes off and dere is dust and smoke everywhere, it starts to clear and da first ting we see is da brick wall. A BIG clue dat me and Jess are no scientists.......

Wow me tinks, Jess does a runner and heads home to Ma and Pa shouting out 'Its all yours Baxter
, I'm not going to doggie prison cause you was hungry for nom nom's', tanks for your support Jess.
I den tink, well maybe de house ok..............

It appears not, da house be muntered...................................................

Oh gosh what I do now, da aftershake dat I done did use to mask da bomb was nuffing like dis big......So I do what any self respecting Spoodle would do, I wee myself!!!
After dat embarrassing fing I'm off home as fast as my little legs would carry me. Im throu da fence, cross da carpark, throu our wall and in da back door in world record time and den I go dive into my basket, I'm shaking and my heart is beating just so fast.
Jess not happy at all and just looks at me and says "Stoopid idiot Baxter"
Den da police do come and also da fire engine, den I get into more trouble cause I cant help it but I howl to da tune of da fire engine.
So far I is safe and nobody finks it is me but now I see Jess talking to da police man and point over at me. I fink she dobbing me in so she gets all da cuddles, bugger.
Im gunna ring my furiend Oz cause he da brightest dog I know and he be my lawyer..........I fink I'm in all sorts of trouble, oh shit wonder what da nom nom's are like in doggie prison.

BOL Baxter

1 comment:

  1. Dont say anything to those police hoomins, Bax. You have right to remain silent!

    Maybe Jess wont rat you out - you should give her extra noms from your dish, to "buy her off"!

    Dis does look like sumthing we could blame on the shakers or aftershakers.

    Keep me posted.